 Gnasche: John Leguizamo? You make the call. |
 E_B_A: "If you need me sir, I'll be in my office gnawing at some trees..." |
 MadSigntist: "Okay, oil's all changed. Now, you want me to rotate your tires, as well?" "Oh, baby...rotate... rotate..." |
 E_B_A: "Okay... there are a few discrepencies with your scale map of Paris, Billy..." |
 HanoverF: "With a York Peppermint Patty it's like I'm in the Andes, my spine is broken, and a Soccer team is feasting on my body for nourishment!" |
 E_B_A: While his wife strained in the agony of child birth, Harold boiled water and then figured, what the heck! Let's make some macaroni and cheese! |
 Angel_Noir: Billy's ability to hide a coat in his stomach and then regurgitate it on command sure impressed the chicks. |
 E_B_A: "Uh. Mr. Nedmiller. That's a toy phone..." "Hush palooka! Gotta nickle in my nose and we're swimming up the fecal trail! Bonanza! Slip'n'slide!" |
 AkiraJones: "Dammit, how many times do I have to tell you--oatmeal's the right thing to do, you son of a bitch!" |
 E_B_A: Failed Superheros #546: "Third Degree Burn Man to the rescue!" *CRACKLE CRUNCH CRACKLE CRACKLE* "Ick!" |
 Hippie: Maybe "Dude, you're a cripple!" wasn't the proper introduction to his new boss at Wheelchairs, Inc. |
 E_B_A: Gee, out of all the Ethopian children I could have gotten to sponsor, why did they stick me with John Goodman? |
 Hippie: You know, now that I HAVE all the Eggos... they seem so meaningless knowing I didn't earn them. |
 Hippie: Why he always chose to represent major characters in his stories with drawings of his own testicles was quite a mystery. Nobody understands genius. |
 Hippie: "I'm the one who collects dues for the Thieves' Society Club. Give the money to me." "Last time you just ran out that door!" "Well... I am a THIEF, dude." |
 Hippie: Hey, honey, it doesn't say anything about killing unsightly large, hairy boils on the scalp. |
 Jazzsoda: As the camera snakes it's way down the Psychic's colon we come upon... it can't be! A brontisaurus trapped in amber? This is incredible! |
 Artanas: o/'"...FAME...I'm gonna live fore...*CRASH* ARRRGGHHH!" *SPLAT* "Damn straight" |
 Jazzsoda: They were so engrossed in their new watermellon tree that they didn't hear the giant beach sandal until it was way too late. |
 Jazzsoda: I hate to make fun of the less fortunate, but I have to say that's one FUCKED up mirror she's got there. |
 Jazzsoda: "Rico Suave: The Sitcom," this fall on You're Shittin Me Network. |
 JediClone: Hello and welcome back to Win Ben Stein's Fruit Bowl! |
 E_B_A: Somehow, 'The Phallus of Liberty' just didn't achieve the same effect. And the inscription! Filth! |
 Artanas: "Go go Gadget NIPPLES!" |
 Hippie: "Wow, you're right, that ear just pops right off." "The real bitch of it is trying to keep my sunglasses on." |
 Seltaeb: "Son, I noticed that you haven't been helping me load the big-ass asparagus onto the truck, and frankly, I'm concerned..." |
 E_B_A: After hours of chewing, Bill blows the world's biggest peanut butter bubble on record. |
 Ragbot: oops, one Tablet 8 times a day... what a silly I am... |
 E_B_A: "Here's the Dixie cups full of Pepto you requested, Mr. Lucas..." "Thanks... I can't write Jar Jar's lines without them." |
 Occupant: Now back to "McHale's Navy Joins the Axis" |
 E_B_A: "And flight 276 taxis in the runway... looks like it may go all the way! YES! YES! TOUCHDOWN! The crowd goes wild!" |
 Occupant: The hell with feeding me, Seymour! I want SEX!!! |
 Seltaeb: Dude, the nicotene patch goes *under* your clothes. |
 Psyko: Calvin Klein's "Obsession" for Idiots. |
 E_B_A: They stole the beginning for "Contact" from the director's cut of "It's A Wonderful Life"? I DID NOT KNOW THAT! |
 Scouty: Some men like baby oil, some like vacuums...for Hector, cold steel bank vaults did the trick. |