 E_B_A: Yes! Yes! Burn the witch! BURN THE WITCH! |
 Angel_Noir: "Pa, we caught something in the planet trap!" |
 Hippie: To no one's surprise, their new motto is "We're so fuckin' baked!" |
 HanoverF: o/` Heres the story, of a man named Brady, Who shouldn't have been allowed to procreate... |
 TravisBickle: *sings* Something here is not like the others... |
 Artanas: "Today's Jeopardy categories are 'Shit' 'Shit' 'Shit' and 'Starts with Sh'. Phil, you get to choose." "Shit." "More specific please." |
 CedrasBlade: The American Dream: Torturing Ricky Martin! |
 Angel_Noir: "Really, I don't mean to be a nuisance, but the thermostat...I mean, is this normal?" |
 E_B_A: Next on 'Too Hot For TV3,' hidden camera shows Santa spreads a little Christmas joy by pole dancing for those hot Antartic babes! |
 E_B_A: Who knew that "Chase Michael J. Fox With A Speeding Truck Until His Heart Explodes" would be such a popular show? Thanks, SciFi! |
 HanoverF: I find the thought of most Canadians in a wonderbra disturbing... but Michael J. Fox somehow manages to pull it off... |
 Hippie: ...Nothing? At least they're not underestimating our intelligence. |
 XTree: "Okay, Mr. Trebek. What is, 'Two things in my nasal passages, boxer John Mugabi, Conan O'Brien, and Flint, Michigan?'" |
 AstroAmy: This modern poetry - I just don't see the appeal. |
 Beedo: None of the above. |
 Hippie: Good soap opera, but its lousy title dictated a short lifespan. |
 Artanas: Captains log: Thick, juicy, full of creamy goodness... pecans... maple syrup... beeswax... lithium... |
 Angel_Noir: "See that, Clarence?" "What sir?" "George and Mary are roleplaying again." "Should we be watching this?" "Shh! He's pulling out the ZuZu Petals body lotion!" |
 Seltaeb: Now on video, "Atoms: Uncut And Uncensored!" Hot fusion action we can't show you here! Call now, supplies are limited! |
 E_B_A: We now return to Alley Macbeal in "Freak on A Leash," only on T.V. From Heaven... |
 MrTim: Scinema: A compound word, derived from "Sci Fi" (n. Crappy programming, or a channel providing same) and "enema." |
 JediClone: Hello, thank you for calling the SciFi.Com Complaint Line. Fuck Off. *click* ...Hello, thank you for calling the SciFi.Com Complaint Line. Fuck Off. *click*... |
 AgentM: Wonder Bread: Now with added hallucinogens! |
 Occupant: My oxymoron alarm just went off |
 E_B_A: No, not the hidesouly dumb movie about computer-obsessed teens, but rather a SciFi film about people with bad coughs. |
 Artanas: By Playskool... that's right kiddies, own your very own Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy and Richard Ramirez action figures today! |
 MrTim: Only on the Science Friction Channel. |
 claimdude: ...Ed's strange selection of wall paint was thought to be somewhat related to his choice of breakfast beverages: Budweiser. |
 Dairai: David Bowie *is* The Fog... coming this fall to the SciFi Channel... |
 E_B_A: "Virtual Bob Dole wants your vote! Vote for Virtual Bob Dole! Give Virtual Bob Dole your vote now!" |
 E_B_A: "Hi! Jonny Deathface here to wish you well! Deathstalker was brought to you by the letter 'F' and the number '2'! you know why, kiddies..." |
 Psyko: "A spoonful of sugar keeps the invaders away!" "Um, Ted, that's boiling oil. Sugar is for the medicine-go-down." "Oh. I... um... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" |
 E_B_A: "All right! Who performed an alien autopsy on the kitchen table!?" "Not me!" "Not me!" "Not me!" |
 Hippie: "Pissing On An Electric Fence." Sounds like an enticing gameshow, but the Sci-Fi Channel is going to have to bullshit a lot to qualify this as sci-fi programmin |
 Jazzsoda: They're going to crush William Shatner with some massive blue bowling balls? Art, are you taping this? |
 HanoverF: Based on the Milton Bradley game 'Chutes and Ladders' |
 Cerg: He never could understand the concept of a toaster. |
 Artanas: "You've foiled me again Tumor man, curses!" "Take that villain! No rest for the wic... wic... " *THUD* "Join us next week for more cancerous action!" |
 JediClone: A woman who takes proffessional quality photos with a third eye on her chin! See her story in Sightings! See her name in the production credits! |