 TravisBickle: That's right phone number. I know you like it rough... a little titty twister for you... ah yeah, that's the stuff. |
 Artanas: "Pay attention kiddies... Jim?" "Yessir?!" "Go fellatiate yourself." "Yessir!" "And that's one to grow on kiddies" |
 TravisBickle: Carlton is so proud to show off his new "wife," Divine. Wait til you see what she can do with dog feces. |
 E_B_A: Carlton Sheets: Investor, Money Manager, Pool Toy, Flotation Device... |
 JediClone: ...but I hate Carlton ALL THE TIME! |
 E_B_A: "But if you wanna know where the real money is... you just... patty cake! Patty cake! Baker's man!" "Crap! Somebody get his medication! Another Nam flashback!" |
 Flanker: "Ha ha ha ha! I will rule the world!!" "...NEXT!!" |
 AgentQ: It got real quiet when suddenly Al started to fart "Also Sparch Zartusa." I DON'T GET IT! |
 Seltaeb: "Pimping Lambchop was a great idea!" |
 E_B_A: ...with hotels on Park Place and Boardwalk! |
 TravisBickle: "One for each personality, right Sybil?" "Right Carlton." "Right Carlton." "Right Carlton." "Right Carlton." "Right Carlton..." |
 TravisBickle: Especially since Carlton had her stuffed. Damn these Disclosure Laws. |
 JediClone: ...But enough about them. Let's get back to the people Mr. Cheets will sell property to... I DON'T GET IT! |
 Meldrick: "The land Carlton sold us did triple in value, once we kicked the Indians off." |
 Occupant: See that chalk outline? That took $10,000 of the closing cost! |
 TravisBickle: Dammit, I study for 30 years and my 16 year old son becomes a respected surgeon. Tell me, coffee table, what would you suggest? Kill him? Well, you're the boss. |
 E_B_A: "Gee Ron! This sure doesn't TASTE like Grandma's cookies!" "That's because we've added the genitals of a litter of kittens into the batter!" "ICK!" |
 Artanas: Mmmm mmmm, nothing says loving like a hot bowl of cement |
 E_B_A: "Now... earlier in the show, we skinned and cored these infant skulls for preprera-STOP THE BOOING! GEEZ!" |
 Seltaeb: Chocolate dipped playing cards are fun and easy to make! They're perfect for rainy days, and kids love 'em! |  Artanas: "Arise! Arise seething Taskbar of doom! Do my bidding!" "Ah no Betty, try the mouse, only Bill Gates can make it work that way." |